Nude Modeling - Adding to THE LIST

I recently discovered that nude models get paid well. Goodbye college, hello new career! Well, maybe I should try it at least once before I dump that long-term investment in my education down the drain.. yada yada :)

First step before applying for a full-time position? Talk to someone with experience. Running through my social network, I realized I don't know anyone who nude models. Unbelievable! I consider calling the Career Services center at my university, but I settle for the next best person I could find, moi.

Naïve Audrey: Good money for little work.

Skeptical Audrey: Is it little work? You’re getting paid well for a reason…

N: Duh, all you have to do is stand there, lie there, whatever.

S: Point proven. When’s the last time you were still for more than ten minutes?

N: Easy—

S: --Sleeping doesn’t count.

N: Damn. Well, I could sit.

Christina, friend who can read minds (as interpreted by Loopy Audrey, who doesn’t focus on accuracy): The hardest part is choosing a comfortable position to stay in, and getting back into that exact same position during the next session for the artists. They’ll yell at you if you’ve moved and now their prize sketch/painting/sculpture is messed up.

Both Audreys: (awed silence at Christina’s brilliance)

Conclusion - I’m going to give it a try. Probably for some random class that meets once ever and only for an hour and has sucky artists. My original thought was adult night classes, but for some reason, that doesn’t seem right…

Open Water Swimming - Adding to THE LIST

Yay for post number one!

I went swimming and made a friend. I’ll call him Earl. Earl was wearing a true blue speedo, lime green swim cap, and sky blue goggles. So what? Later, I realized why he looked so familiar - he resembled a world map circa 2050. Tiny blue suit for the bit of surviving ocean, lime green radioactive mold, even white hair where the last remaining glaciers are melting and browned skin for the landfills. A true worldly man.

Anyway, whether he was trying out a new halloween costume or not, Earl competes in open water races.

According to Wikipedia…

"Open water swimming takes place in outdoor bodies of water such as open oceans, bays, lakes, rivers, canals, reservoirs, etc."

…just in case that needed clarification. Like maybe you thought it was a game of human bait and circling sharks. Last one still treading water (not floating because that means you’re dead) wins.

Since it’s been established that open water swimming ideally does not involve large-fanged predators, I’ve added, “Compete in an open-water swim race” to THE LIST.

In other matters, I wonder what color Earl’s wetsuit is.